What’s changed, what hasn’t, and how to truly support survivors.

It’s been seven years since the #MeToo movement went viral. Seven years since timelines were flooded with testimonies, whispered secrets made public, stories that had been buried by shame, fear, or silence finally finding oxygen. The ripple was global. Personal. Loud. And for many, deeply confronting.

We were asked to reckon with what we’d ignored. With what we’d excused. With the fact that survivors are everywhere, in our homes, workplaces, group chats, and friendships. And yet, despite the power of that collective roar, we still live in a world that struggles to hear them.

So, where are we now?

Let’s have a look at what’s changed :

Language

“Consent,” “power dynamics,” “gaslighting,” and “coercion” have entered the mainstream. We’re (finally) asking better questions about sex, pleasure, and agency.

Visibility

Survivors are speaking up more than before, and some are even being listened to. High-profile cases are getting airtime. Some people in power are being held accountable (sort of).

Policy

Workplaces are more likely to have harassment policies. There’s mandatory training in some sectors. HR departments are slightly less clueless.

Culture 

We’ve stopped pretending that sexual violence only happens in dark alleys. The conversation has moved into bedrooms, boardrooms, and brunch tables.

But before we give anyone any kudos, let’s look at what still needs to change :

Justice systems still fail survivors. In South Africa, it's estimated that less than 10% of rapes are reported, and fewer still result in convictions. Survivors aren’t believed, they’re more likely to be retraumatized, or ignored completely.

We still center perpetrators. “But he’s such a good guy.” “What about his career?” “Are you sure that’s what happened?”

We reward silence. Women are still losing jobs, reputations, and relationships for telling the truth. The risk of speaking up often outweighs the reward.

Survivors are tired. Tired of educating others, tired of explaining the obvious, tired of navigating spaces that pretend to be safe but aren’t.

So what’s next?

The work doesn’t end when April does. Awareness months are great for rallying attention, but culture shifts when that attention becomes action. If you’re wondering what you can do to show up better for survivors, here’s where to start:

How to Be a Better Ally (Today, Tomorrow, and Always)

 

1. Believe them.

No follow-up interrogation needed. If someone trusts you enough to share, don’t question their reality. Don’t play devil’s advocate. Just listen.

2. Don’t centre yourself.

“I can’t believe this happened to you” or “I feel so bad now” turns their pain into your drama. This isn’t about your discomfort. Sit with it.

3. Drop the platitudes.

Things like “Everything happens for a reason” or “At least it wasn’t worse” aren’t comforting, they’re dismissive. Try: “I’m so sorry this happened to you. I’m here.”

4. Respect boundaries, all of them.

Whether it’s not asking for details, not touching without consent, or giving them space to ghost you for a while, let survivors call the shots.

5. Call it out when it’s “just a joke.”

Rape jokes, victim-blaming, locker room talk : silence is complicity. Be the person who ruins the vibe in the name of safety.

6. Do your own homework.

Don’t make survivors your personal trauma encyclopaedias. Learn about consent, trauma responses, and systemic abuse from the many resources available. (See list below.)

7. Support survivor-led spaces.

Donate, volunteer, amplify. Advocate for policy change. Hire survivors. Believe in their stories and their futures.

We All Know Someone

Whether we know it or not, we all know someone who’s been sexually harassed, assaulted, or abused. It may be your best friend. It may be your colleague. It may be you.

The question isn’t if someone in your life has survived sexual violence.
The question is: Will they be safe telling you?

Let’s build a world where the answer is yes.

South African Support & Resources

• Rape Crisis – www.rapecrisis.org.za | 021 447 9762 (24hr Helpline – WC)
  

• Lifeline SA – 0861 322 322 (24hr nationwide counselling)
  

• TEARS Foundation – SMS “help” to 1347355#
  

• People Opposing Women Abuse (POWA) – www.powa.co.za

• Thuthuzela Care Centres – Comprehensive post-rape care across SA (via NPA)